about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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