so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
