We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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