Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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