He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
then he tried to convert me to islam
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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