oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
