oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize