I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
