that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
