Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
