He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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