so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize