That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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