my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
