summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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