Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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