That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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