my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
