i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I think im going to throw up on grandma
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
