My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
