so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
