Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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