How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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