Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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