well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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