Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
