i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I think im going to throw up on grandma
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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