my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
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This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
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I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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