I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
