I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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