butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
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