I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
