he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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