Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
