I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Randomize
