She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
