you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
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Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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