I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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