who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
We need to get me chipped asap
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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