spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize