So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize