I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
