Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.

  (1-516): View more from New York

  True life - we need to smoke together more often

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  (516): Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters. (1-516): True life - we need to smoke together more often http://tfl.nu/s2bm
  Replies (8) Good night (3976) Bad night (620)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?

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  (904): There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it? http://tfl.nu/a6bf
  Replies (92) Good night (2597) Bad night (3325)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.

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  (586): Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world. http://tfl.nu/7ye4
  Replies (14) Good night (4007) Bad night (832)
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  (916): View more from California

  Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.

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  (916): Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown. http://tfl.nu/0cdq
  Replies (5) Good night (3496) Bad night (1283)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast

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  (502): How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast http://tfl.nu/g6rv
  Replies (15) Good night (1879) Bad night (4398)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.

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  (319): i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie. http://tfl.nu/wyd8
  Replies (7) Good night (1012) Bad night (2589)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN

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  (360): WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN http://tfl.nu/hvye
  Replies (12) Good night (1495) Bad night (656)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".

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  (613): You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast". http://tfl.nu/iqmw
  Replies (12) Good night (2526) Bad night (645)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying

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  (330): I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying http://tfl.nu/l6qe
  Replies (6) Good night (429) Bad night (765)
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  (805): View more from California

  I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras

  (1-805): View more from California

  hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.

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  (805): I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras (1-805): hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five. http://tfl.nu/dvx9
  Replies (0) Good night (636) Bad night (365)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  My vag hurts but I feel vindicated

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  That is an interesting emotion combo

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  (609): My vag hurts but I feel vindicated (832): That is an interesting emotion combo http://tfl.nu/j6ty
  Replies (1) Good night (685) Bad night (325)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?

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  (317): I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened? http://tfl.nu/0nes
  Replies (2) Good night (284) Bad night (551)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.

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  (520): YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND. http://tfl.nu/s2r1
  Replies (11) Good night (348) Bad night (1326)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  "what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.

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  (330): "what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that. http://tfl.nu/c3qo
  Replies (1) Good night (693) Bad night (301)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day

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  (518): Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day http://tfl.nu/4jpm
  Replies (1) Good night (360) Bad night (219)

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