You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
