did you get engaged???
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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