Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
