Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
