The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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