So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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