I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
