who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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