I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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